you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
