was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
