we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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