Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
