Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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