I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
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Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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