She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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