did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
