Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
