I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
