I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
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i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
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I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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