well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Will exercising make me less horny?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
