why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.