What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
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