kristin has been a bad kristin
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize