You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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