he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I've blown a few things in my day
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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