My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize
