Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
