Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
this is an emotional support booty call
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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