Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
