I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Randomize
