ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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