How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I believe in your delicious
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
