I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
