At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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