Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
