Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.