The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
How external is "for external use only"?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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