bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
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