If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
