A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
