Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
And the cops told us we were all naked.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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