I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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