You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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