Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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