Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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