so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
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What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
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He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...