FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
