oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
