did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
