im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
