I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
