Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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