Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
