Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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