I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize