It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
