You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
