thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
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theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10